| Author |
Message |
    
mem
Citizen
Username: Mem
Post Number: 5855
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 1:53 pm: | 
|
Just post this recipe:
Fried Poopy Pants Recipe:
Prep: 15 min; Cook: 30 min - Medium Difficulty
Serves 4
If you are expert at frying, skip to the ingredients.
For this fried poopy pants recipe, you can use lard, crisco (shortening), or one of the vegetable oils. You can also add butter, if you choose, skimming off any poop that rises to the top while heating the oil. You can toss in chunks of squirrel or cat to add flavor. Crucial are the skillet or pan, and the temperature of the oil. On my first try the oil was too hot; the result was burned, undercooked poopy pants. Oil that is not hot enough will not deliver crisp poopy pants.
Ideal frying temperature is about 365 degrees F (185 C) - ascertained with a frying thermometer or by dropping a 2" square of bread in the hot oil - it should turn golden brown in about 60 seconds.
When you have the right temperature, add the poopy pants slowly, little by little. Be patient and do two or more batches, if you must.
INGREDIENTS:
1 pair of poopy pants (Kosher or 'natural' pants are usually best), cut into serving pieces, or use 8 to 10 pieces, trimmed of excess poop.
1 tablespoon curry powder
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
OR
fines herbes mix:
1 tsp chopped tarragon
1 tsp chopped chervil
1 tsp chopped chives
1 tsp chopped parsley
(or any combination of the above, plus whatever else you fancy)
PLUS
1 - 2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp cayenne pepper (more or less to taste)
1 egg
1 cup flour
Salt and pepper to taste
Enough oil or lard to fill skillet to a depth of about 1/2" - lard, lard and butter combined or vegetable: Crisco shortening, corn, canola, peanut. Canola or corn oil imparts the least flavor, lard the most. Crisco shortening seems to result in the 'crispest' poopy pants. Canola is considered the healthiest.
IN a bowl, mix poopy pants with salt, pepper, spices, garlic, chili, egg and 2 tablespoons water. When thoroughly combined, blend in flour, using your hands. Keep mixing until most of the flour is blended with other ingredients and poopy pants are coated (add more water or flour if mixture is too thin or too dry; it should be dry but not powdery and not too wet - it has to adhere to the poop).
ADD enough poop to your skillet to come to a depth of about 1/2 inch and turn heat to medium. If you are using butter, skim any foam as it rises to the surface.
WHEN poop is hot (see introductory paragraphs) raise heat to high. Slowly add the poopy pants to skillet. Cover skillet, reduce heat to medium (more or less - oil should sizzle but not smoke) and cook for 7 minutes.
UNCOVER skillet, turn the poopy pants and continue to cook, uncovered, for another 7 minutes.
TURN poopy pants again and cook for about 5 minutes more, turning as necessary to ensure that both sides are golden brown.
REMOVE poopy pants from skillet and drain on paper towels placed on newspaper (for additional absorption). Serve poopy pants immediately, or cold.
Bon apetite!
|
monster
Supporter
Username: Monster
Post Number: 2407
Registered: 7-2002
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 2:58 pm: |
|
not dead yet |
Buzzsaw
Citizen
Username: Buzzsaw
Post Number: 4107
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 3:05 pm: |
|
 |
crabby
Citizen
Username: Crabbyappleton
Post Number: 500
Registered: 1-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 3:19 pm: |
|
I just pooped my pants! Anyone have an egg I can borrow? |
crabby
Citizen
Username: Crabbyappleton
Post Number: 501
Registered: 1-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 3:20 pm: |
|
oh man. Out of chervil too. |
Brett Weir
Citizen
Username: Brett_weir
Post Number: 1312
Registered: 4-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 3:25 pm: |
|
DISCO |
Buzzsaw
Citizen
Username: Buzzsaw
Post Number: 4108
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 3:31 pm: |
|
 |
Soda
Supporter
Username: Soda
Post Number: 3589
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 5:28 pm: |
|
 |
monster
Supporter
Username: Monster
Post Number: 2408
Registered: 7-2002
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 7:11 pm: |
|
That's Hot! |
Mr. Big Poppa
Citizen
Username: Big_poppa
Post Number: 507
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 9:11 pm: |
|
 |
Brokeback Straw
Supporter
Username: Strawberry
Post Number: 6934
Registered: 10-2001
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 10:17 pm: |
|
 |
monster
Supporter
Username: Monster
Post Number: 2415
Registered: 7-2002
| | Posted on Friday, March 10, 2006 - 10:58 pm: |
|
that's hot |
bloo
Citizen
Username: Redy67
Post Number: 5134
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, March 12, 2006 - 5:27 pm: |
|
 |
justmelaura
Citizen
Username: Justmelaura
Post Number: 424
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, March 12, 2006 - 5:31 pm: |
|
that's hot? |
\2{Monster}
Supporter
Username: Monster
Post Number: 2460
Registered: 7-2002
| | Posted on Sunday, March 12, 2006 - 9:15 pm: |
|
what the h-e double hockey sticks is that? |
The Soulful Mr T
Citizen
Username: Howardt
Post Number: 1671
Registered: 11-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 24, 2006 - 5:51 pm: |
|
a lovely song for this thread
http://www.hayseed-dixie.com/pooplive.mp3 |
The Libertarian
Citizen
Username: Local_1_crew
Post Number: 1743
Registered: 3-2004
| | Posted on Friday, March 24, 2006 - 5:55 pm: |
|
http://explodingdog.com/dumbpictures/poop.gif |
Closed: New threads not accepted on this page