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Message |
    
Smarty Jones
Citizen
Username: Birdstone
Post Number: 791
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 8:45 am: | 
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Just curious....what's your relationship like? Strong? Strained? What drives you nutz? What do you appreciate? In our breif time here, I've certainly learned that this is a very engaging town, for good and bad...maybe it's the proximity of homes, maybe it's the attitude. How do you handle your neighbors pets? Their Kids? Their overgrown weeds going into your yard? Their endless Pool Parties, their music, and their borrowing?
DO TELL! |
red
Citizen
Username: Redy67
Post Number: 5870
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 8:49 am: |
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I love all my neighbors. We are extraordinarily lucky. I would like to move to a larger house, but the thought of moving onto another street with neighbors I don't get along with is not appealing.
We do monthly happy hours, help out with each other's chldren, fix items that are needed at each other's houses... |
Smarty Jones
Citizen
Username: Birdstone
Post Number: 792
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 10:01 am: |
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Hmmmmmmmmmmm.... then I have to assume that YOU are the neighbor driving everyone else batty :-)
"If you sit at the poker table, and you don't know who the fool is, than it's likely you!" |
S.L.K. 2.0
Citizen
Username: Scrotisloknows
Post Number: 1734
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 11:39 am: |
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no wonder why Smarty is considering buying a piece... 
-SLK |
Smarty Jones
Citizen
Username: Birdstone
Post Number: 795
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 12:11 pm: |
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Maybe it's subliminal....I realized that after posting one thread immediately after another.... |
Factvsfiction
Citizen
Username: Factvsfiction
Post Number: 698
Registered: 4-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 12:33 pm: |
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As a good number of people in our area tend to have healthy egos and a great sense of self-importance, (real or imagined) applying this knowledge to how you interact with them gives you some benefits.
If you engage them on that basis and make sure they know you are trying to be considerate of them in what you are doing to or on your property, like adding an addition, you will probably have courteous relations.
Some small time flattery ( "wow, I really like the color you painted your shutters!" ) also helps when approaching them for a favor or discussing what you think will be a problem. |
Tom Reingold
Supporter
Username: Noglider
Post Number: 14752
Registered: 1-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 12:47 pm: |
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The worst things that have happened (that I can remember) is that I overheard one neighbor make a comment to another neighbor about my weeds. That hurt my feelings. But I didn't address it. Another neighbor told me that I should hire a landscaper, because that's what people in the suburbs do. I let that go, too.
Other than that, everyone is great. I would not choose all of these people as friends, but we are cordial with one another. We have an annual block party which combines my block with the one to the east. It's very nice.
My neighbors are happy to help out whenever I ask, and I do the same in return. Another thing that's cool is when they have to say no to my requests, they do so firmly and fairly, which I really appreciate.
There's one family near us up with whom we have become very good friends. There are other neighbors with who we are friends, but this one family feels as close as our own family.
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Just The Aunt
Supporter
Username: Auntof13
Post Number: 5411
Registered: 1-2004
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 1:33 pm: |
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Tom-
Why would your feelings be hurt if someone made a comment about your weeds? I think if it were me I'd be embarassed my yard was in such bad state someone even mentioned it to someone else. That's why we hire someone to take care of our grass, and weeds. |
Tom Reingold
Supporter
Username: Noglider
Post Number: 14755
Registered: 1-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 1:57 pm: |
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I do my best. It's not up to someone else's standards. I'm sure there are areas in your life where that is true for you. It is hurtful for someone to make comments about me when he thinks it's behind my back but it turns out to be in earshot. He may have intended for me to hear, which was certainly a backhanded way of complaining to me.
The decision to hire someone is mine, and the standards for my home are mine. I don't have to hire someone just because I'm not as good a gardener as some others on my block. Unless of course the neighbor wants to pay the bill.
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Mergele
Citizen
Username: Mergele
Post Number: 404
Registered: 7-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 2:09 pm: |
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That's ok, Tom. My neighbor actually sneaks into my yard and pulls the occasional monster 4-foot dandelion when she finds one particularly offensive 
... she is a green thumb of the highest order and her back yard is paradise compared to mine. We have become great friends, and although we both joke about it, she still feels the need to sneak in and kill the weeds, and I still feel mildly guilty that she gets to them before I do. |
greenthumb
Citizen
Username: Green_thumb
Post Number: 20
Registered: 5-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 2:11 pm: |
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You could always tell your neighbor your weeds are wildflowers -- one man's weed is another's treasure |
mjc
Citizen
Username: Mjc
Post Number: 1198
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 2:33 pm: |
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Our neighbors are the very best. They are kind, pleasant, honorable people who also (secondarily) keep their property in presentable to spectacular shape. The problems that have come up (the dog comes to visit from time to time, the cat attacks the dog, our kid hit their kid, the lights shine into our windows, they have a view of our trash cans while we have a view of their garden) have never stood in the way, and I'm truly grateful.
Whoever buys our house will have to refinish the floors, and will no doubt find some unwanted surprises as any new homeowner does, but they will have the happy surprise of wonderful neighbors. |
Psychomom
Citizen
Username: Psychomom
Post Number: 181
Registered: 5-2005
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 2:58 pm: |
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my neighbors are all cordial but we don't really hang out all that much. Most of us work and people seem to have all kinds of crazy hours.
Right now we have new neighbors next door, they have been gutting the place for months now. But seem pretty nice.
House on other side is vacant and for sale. Grass is getting pretty high. My husband has at times mowed it himself. |
Joanne G
Citizen
Username: Joanne
Post Number: 220
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 3:21 pm: |
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Well, I hate to break the happy party - and at least it's not in your neighbourhood - but on one side I have neighbours from the nicer side of hell!
Their radio is up so loud I can always hear the races (horse) - all day, no matter where in my house I am. I can hear the not-so-happy tinkle of endless empty beer bottles clatter into their recycling bin morning and night - startling numbers considering I believe there are just two elderly pensioners in that house. But that doesn't account for the shudders when I know they're in residence.
They always ALWAYS get my name wrong. Always. Nothing remotely like my name. How can you get 'Joanne' wrong when it is said to you? - and keep calling me Linda in return???!!! Even that wouldn't be bad enough.
They barbecue over my laundry - wait until my laundry is on the washing line then fire up the barbie and let it smoke all over the washing all day. If they get the chance they'll continue for three days straight! (We don't own a dryer and there's nowhere else to dry laundry)
Anytime we turn on the house irrigation system, they complain that the microspray system on their side is 'rotting the foundations of their house' as a 'pool is developing under the carport'. Their house is lower than ours and was built later by different owners; the run-off from the micro-spray results in a half-centimetre deep puddle after 5 hours of use. Rain water leaves a deeper puddle. But hey - we're rotting the foundations of their house! So the plants on three sides of our house have died as a result of not being able to use the irrigation system, and our landlords hate us as we don't water the garden.
Even that isn't bad enough on its own: they're trying to insist we should mow their lawns and cut their trees too! You see, he's a pensioner and can't afford to do it! Well, we both are very low-income, have persistent health conditions to watch, do not own garden equipment - and it's THEIR yard! They already hire people to come in because I've seen them! The law says they can chop tree-bits on their side of the fence and they should, instead of whingeing.
It's just horrible when they're in town. Luckily, they don't come up very often (once a month at most). On the other side, Peter and Maureen are just wonderful even if they do have noisy fowl and dogs. |
Billy Jack
Citizen
Username: Kendalbill
Post Number: 181
Registered: 6-2002
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 3:55 pm: |
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We have terrific neighbors. I'd say that even if they didn't know who I was. |
themp
Supporter
Username: Themp
Post Number: 3016
Registered: 12-2001
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 3:57 pm: |
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My neighbor is a real piece of work, but he ead-rays everything on is-thay ite-say, so I can't o-gay into it ight-ray ow-nay. |
greenthumb
Citizen
Username: Green_thumb
Post Number: 22
Registered: 5-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 5:38 pm: |
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Most of my neighbors are great but ONE....built a new house; had the new blacktop put down on the driveway which means you can't drive on it for a few days; then started getting deliveries of furniture etc. We live on a pretty busy street and trucks can't park safely on the street. Apparently my new neighbor just told all the delivery guys to use MY driveway -- never introduced himself to me or asked if I would even mind. After the first incident when I couldn't get out of my garage because of a mystery truck, I went over and spoke with the new neighbor and asked that my driveway not be used w/o my permission in this manner. I was even nice about it. When I came home from shopping there was ANOTHER truck in my driveway. I parked and blocked the driver in for about an hour. The driver gave my new neighbor a really hard time and at least the neighbor stopped telling delivery trucks to park in my driveway. Must admit we're not too friendly to this day. |
mimosa
Citizen
Username: Mimosa
Post Number: 216
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 8:29 pm: |
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Wow, greenthumb! That is amazingly selfish on their part. Unbelievable, shocking...I can't imagine having the nerve to do that to a neighbor. I couldn't even be sightly friendly to such an arrogant person. I love the way you resolved it. Justice! |
red
Citizen
Username: Redy67
Post Number: 5876
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Monday, June 19, 2006 - 8:59 pm: |
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smarty how'd you guess I was the crazy neighbor? |
Nob
Citizen
Username: Nob
Post Number: 219
Registered: 4-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 9:21 am: |
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Anyone read "The Sociopath Next Door"? |
Tuxedo
Citizen
Username: Tuxedo
Post Number: 45
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 9:59 am: |
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Well, I've got the guy who mows once every 2.5 weeks, at best. Grass growing in the sidewalk, Maplewood weeds everywhere.
Really sweet man, but his yard is bringing down the hood. Everyone tells me to say nothing, 'you can't control' etc. but it's unpleasant to look at. I've held my tongue for 6 summers, but I'm about done with it now. We always cross our fingers when we plan parties, hoping he's going to mow.
Do you really think I'd ruin a relationship if I were to talk to him about it? Is there any way to effectively handle without offending?
My bro, who lives in Millburn, had a similar issue with his neighbor, and just mowed his neighbor's lawn when it got long.
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Psychomom
Citizen
Username: Psychomom
Post Number: 185
Registered: 5-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 10:11 am: |
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My husband has been known to mow our neighbor's when it gets long...our yards are small and the backyards are open.
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S.L.K. 2.0
Citizen
Username: Scrotisloknows
Post Number: 1738
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 12:53 pm: |
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Tuxedo-
I guess another question you could ask is how "unkept" does a lawn have to be before the town writes a ticket? |
Smarty Jones
Citizen
Username: Birdstone
Post Number: 802
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 21, 2006 - 12:33 am: |
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I'm yet undecided on many of my neighbors...for some reason, this winter/spring has brought about different sides of people....maybe the honeymoon period is over?? |
Tuxedo
Citizen
Username: Tuxedo
Post Number: 50
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 21, 2006 - 11:27 am: |
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Or, maybe it's that you're looking more closely at things. That's what we discovered.
At first we were in love with everything, but as time marches on one starts noticing more stuff. That's natural. Hence the honeymoon period.
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