| Author |
Message |
    
ess
Citizen
Username: Ess
Post Number: 2871
Registered: 11-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:06 am: | 
|
This concern jumped out at me following the morphing of the thread about advance notice for children's parties. It seemed like a straightforward topic to me, but it changed into yet another debate about who has it tougher, singles versus marrieds versus parents versus non-parents, etc. There were some unnecessary, in my opinion, barbs thrown in there.
It seems that way too many threads evolve into a snipfest, with people counting posts and eviscerating other posters for daring to have - gasp - opinions or feelings. Disagreement is fine and healthy, but why does it have to turn nasty? |
buzzsaw
Citizen
Username: Buzzsaw
Post Number: 5449
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:09 am: |
|
That's the one minor problem with anonymous message boards.
Why are you posting this at 10.06am - that's not a good time for you to post - what's that all about - this is something that you should post at 10.08 - what do you have a problem with 10.08? |
LilLB
Citizen
Username: Lillb
Post Number: 2182
Registered: 10-2002
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:19 am: |
|
ess - You have a lot of nerve starting a thread like this! Who the heck to you think you are anyway??  |
John Caffrey
Citizen
Username: Jerseyjack
Post Number: 418
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:22 am: |
|
Fercrissakes can't you both grow up and compromise on 10:07? Or maybe agree on a a time frame around 11 p.m. in the evening when its o.k. to post sniping stuff similar to a time out time instead of where there is no sniping, all sniping stuff is o.k.? |
Cynicalgirl
Citizen
Username: Cynicalgirl
Post Number: 3031
Registered: 9-2003
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:29 am: |
|
I think it's the weather, and boredom. Kinda like in the dead of winter, when you can't afford (time/money) to go on vacation, and outside is kinda sucky, and the news is all bad, and...Like the crime rate going up in the city when packed together denizens without a/c get violent. |
Project 37
Citizen
Username: Project37
Post Number: 180
Registered: 3-2006
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:31 am: |
|
Jeez, John - do you want to try using LONGER sentences?!? 
(!) |
ess
Citizen
Username: Ess
Post Number: 2872
Registered: 11-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 10:37 am: |
|
Don't you people realize that choosing a time to post is highly personal? We all have reasons for choosing a time. 10:06 happens to be the time when I started my first SAT, so it means a lot to me! And you all have to jump all over it!
Cyn - you got something against summer? What about all the other seasons? As if winter is so great!
|
Cynicalgirl
Citizen
Username: Cynicalgirl
Post Number: 3032
Registered: 9-2003
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:34 am: |
|
Summer blows, or at least this part of it. Hot, sticky, high electric bills. Kids underfoot alla time. Freakin' bugs everywhere. You can have it. And January and February stink, too. |
John Caffrey
Citizen
Username: Jerseyjack
Post Number: 419
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:41 am: |
|
Proj. You have no business posting this complaint. It is not 11.p.m., nor is it 10:07 a.m. |
ess
Citizen
Username: Ess
Post Number: 2873
Registered: 11-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:53 am: |
|
Cyn - I happen to agree. Excessive heat, humidity that trashes the hair, stinky garbage -- ecch. It is SO much easier to warm up than to cool down.
As I am fond of saying, everyone complains about the weather, but no one does anything about it. |
Dr. Winston O'Boogie
Citizen
Username: Casey
Post Number: 2281
Registered: 8-2003
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:58 am: |
|
typical "progressive" anti-Summertism |
Joanne G
Citizen
Username: Joanne
Post Number: 422
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 5:10 pm: |
|
Dr W, I loved that one!!!!!! Just made my day! 
It's freezing again here, Spring is starting to appear (buds on trees, daphne, daffodils and irises blooming etc) and already it's Horses Birthday (August 1st). Perhaps people are just responding to a perceived lack of time for themselves, to the heat, to the realisation that Christmas is much closer than you'd like...not to mention, isn't your financial year about to close soon?
The advantage of living so far away is that I can choose to ignore snippy posts, or laugh at childish snippiness, and merrily go to work while you're thinking about time off work. Oh joy! (been typing meeting minutes for 2 hours. It's now just on 7 am, have to go to work...yuck).
Sort it out kids - make up or choose to disagree, jsut don't destroy each other in the process.
 |
combustion
Citizen
Username: Spontaneous
Post Number: 335
Registered: 4-2006
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 6:56 pm: |
|
Ess,
Um, getting back to the original question on this thread. You made reference to the thread about notice for a child's party. Look at the opening statement on that thread, then read down. The question posed in that thread was legit, but the attitude it was given with, along with the snide remark later thrown in which got under the skin of a few people (myself included), it was bound to turn ugly sooner or later. I think it may be caused by people not carefully proof-reading their posts before submitting them. I'm not pointing fingers, I've been guilty of the same myself. |
red
Citizen
Username: Redy67
Post Number: 6670
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 7:09 pm: |
|
I think sometimes people just want to start a debate, to get a conversation going, something to do when bored.... |
Monster©
Supporter
Username: Monster
Post Number: 4288
Registered: 7-2002
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 7:38 pm: |
|
shut up, and work on your sexiness!
or
maybe go see a movie.... |
ess
Citizen
Username: Ess
Post Number: 2886
Registered: 11-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 7:41 pm: |
|
Combustion, I hear you, and can understand why certain comments/tones/inferences could get under one's skin (myself included). Sometimes, threads begin innocently enough, but then when there is debate, people resort to name-calling and a general level of nastiness.
I am most certainly not pointing fingers, either.
There are probably many reasons why a thread can turn nasty. Boredom is no doubt one of them.
I'm glad we have this forum to chat and learn and even disagree, but the nastiness really does disturb me. Some of the comments on this thread just underscore how silly some of the attacks can be.
|
Scully
Citizen
Username: Scully
Post Number: 854
Registered: 8-2005
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 8:17 pm: |
|
ess -
I know what you mean. There were a few posts a while back (B&B, Peace Rally, the Nellie Olsen situation, to name a few) that were total attack-fests.
And I hate the name calling. If you want to argue fine. But if you have no facts to back your position and therefore have to resort to name calling well, admit it, you lost!
|
greenetree
Supporter
Username: Greenetree
Post Number: 8775
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:45 pm: |
|
I have not been able to be online in four days so I haven't read the thread mentioned. However, Scully and Ess - I must say that you low-life know-it-alls have no business having opinions on anything, seeing as how I am childless and overworked and superior because my brain has not rotted from Barney and Teletubbies.
You can't even post after 11p.
So, what is this about, anyway? |
Peter G. Magic
Citizen
Username: Pmagic
Post Number: 187
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, July 31, 2006 - 11:52 pm: |
|
Yes, some of it is due to anonymity. But the rest is just rushing to post and not thinking before posting. I am guilty of the latter. Earlier today I hurt someone's feelings without meaning to because I didn't read carefully and was in a hurry. |
Scully
Citizen
Username: Scully
Post Number: 861
Registered: 8-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 12:06 am: |
|
greenetree -
ess was referring to a thread nominally about how far ahead one should send out invitations for a children's party (pretty hot topic, eh?) but it dissolved into an argument about who busier, singles versus marrieds versus parents versus non-parents.
BTW you had me going for a minute. Gullible is me middle name... |
Mayor McCheese
Supporter
Username: Mayor_mccheese
Post Number: 2015
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 12:07 am: |
|
Scully, sorry about that B&B thread, that was partly me. I am usually well behaved, but every once and a while... Sometimes it is hard to hold back what you really think.
I have been good since then, for the most part. 
|
ess
Citizen
Username: Ess
Post Number: 2895
Registered: 11-2001
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 12:17 am: |
|
Greenetree, Scully, et al:
It wasn't only the kid's party thread, but that was the one that really stood out for me. I certainly can understand getting irritated enough to post something without thinking, but why it has to degenerate into something personal is unfortunate. (I would say it is beyond me, but I have been guilty of doing it as well, or at least wanting to do it. We can't all be as good as the Mayor. )
Btw, Greenetree, I am NOT a know-it-all! |
red
Citizen
Username: Redy67
Post Number: 6681
Registered: 2-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 8:38 am: |
|
But ess, I rely on you for all my answers! I thought you knew it all!! |
HKing
Citizen
Username: Hking
Post Number: 34
Registered: 4-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 12:23 pm: |
|
I have to 2nd ess's original statement.
I posted on please help looking for activities for my 4 year old. I got a lot of good responses and then at the end it looks to be turning into a debate about overscheduling and the amount of acitivities and some person helpfully telling me her kids didn't need extra activities.
Why do people make assumptions based on a few sentences in a thread and offer unsollicited advice? I didn't ask whether I should sign him up for stuff or what the right amount of activites would be for his age group. I asked -- what's out there?
I'm new here and I don't know everything that's available. My son is very social and I'm desperately looking for friends for him as he left a lot of good buddies behind in Chicago.
Whew. That feels better. Thanks for this thread. I had posted something on my original thread and thought better. Someone would just take it that I was against their opinion when really I just don't care about their opinion b/c that wasn't my question! :-) |
mjh
Supporter
Username: Mjh
Post Number: 711
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 12:53 pm: |
|
HKing;
Don't go away mad.........There are always a few jerks in the mix, but most people (especially in the "Please Help" and "virtual cafe" sections) are helpful and are also welcoming to newcomers. The friends issue for your son is important, so don't give up the hunt (my son is 10, or I'd volunteer him for a playdate).
Their is at least one mothers group and a Newcomers Club. I don't belong to either, but if you'd like more information, I'm sure you can get it if you're willing to ask for help on-line again! Also, you can simply post interest in playdates with kids of similar age and interests, and you might get responses.
Sorry you had a hard time, but stick with it. |
BGS
Supporter
Username: Bgs
Post Number: 1210
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 2:25 pm: |
|
Hking- I PL'D you. BGS |
HKing
Citizen
Username: Hking
Post Number: 36
Registered: 4-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 3:48 pm: |
|
Not super mad, not going away, and want to convey my thoughts in a way that doesn't offend, which is hard on a message board.
I just wanted to vent a little and I agree with this topic. Lately (and I am new so it may be par for the course), I've noticed threads turning into strange debates that may or may not have anything to do with the intent of the original poster. Sometimes the discussion that occurs on those threads is not particularly productive to the person who started it or to the person reading it to get the same information for herself.
That being said. I love MOL. I've gotten a TON of wonderful advice here. Everyone, except the troll(s?), is most kind and helpful. |
Joanne G
Citizen
Username: Joanne
Post Number: 431
Registered: 10-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 4:25 pm: |
|
so - HKing, welcome! |
Rastro
Citizen
Username: Rastro
Post Number: 3671
Registered: 5-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 4:39 pm: |
|
I am tired of having to couch what I say so as not to offend the most thin-skinned, looking-for-offense housewife. And yes, it's all housewives. They have nothing to do, unlike us working parents! And forget those single people who have no kids. They have no idea how tough life is, yet thy complain all the time - "Why can't find someone to love me?" "Why are all the good men taken or gay?" What's with that thing on your..." nevermind.
I definitely think it's boredom and being stir-crazy from the heat.
BTW, that first paragraph was a joke. If you didn't get it, or it offended you, tough titties.
Note, what's also scary is that "titties" passed the spell check. |
Mayor McCheese
Supporter
Username: Mayor_mccheese
Post Number: 2038
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 6:53 pm: |
|
I demand an apology from Rastro for using the word "single" instead of the more appropriate term "unattached." |
buzzsaw
Citizen
Username: Buzzsaw
Post Number: 5482
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 7:03 pm: |
|
shut up punks |
Rastro
Citizen
Username: Rastro
Post Number: 3672
Registered: 5-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 10:59 pm: |
|
One can be single, and attached. So quit yer whining, ya damn wuss. Go find yourself some broad who's not offended by your back hair. |
Mayor McCheese
Supporter
Username: Mayor_mccheese
Post Number: 2039
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 11:08 pm: |
|
"ya damn wuss."
So now you are personally attacking me? |
Rastro
Citizen
Username: Rastro
Post Number: 3674
Registered: 5-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 11:12 pm: |
|
If the shoe fits...  |
Mayor McCheese
Supporter
Username: Mayor_mccheese
Post Number: 2041
Registered: 7-2004
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 11:17 pm: |
|
This thread has turned into a series of attacks. |
Bajou
Citizen
Username: Bajou
Post Number: 1472
Registered: 2-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, August 1, 2006 - 11:33 pm: |
|
Frankly I think that back hair can be very comforting and again like the front version (titti hair) can be braided most attractively.
Ess: I know I have let steam off on the board (mostly while at work) that seemed a little harsh and I do apologze but if Monster (see JB's thread "As*hole") is the aforementioned then I am the Biatch. One has a reputation to protect and although it sometimes is hard work on other days my natural talent to be one just shines. On those days I really look forward to Rastro's posts (Southerner will do too)
Looking forward to seeing all of u on Saturday. |
Rastro
Citizen
Username: Rastro
Post Number: 3675
Registered: 5-2004
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 2, 2006 - 11:47 am: |
|
Me??? what the hell did I ever do? |
The Soulful Mr T
Citizen
Username: Howardt
Post Number: 2308
Registered: 11-2004
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 2, 2006 - 1:34 pm: |
|
Bicker Bicker Bicker! That's all you ever do!!
The kicker for me is how the "Where to get the best bagels now that Sonny's..." thread turned into a bicker-bicker-bicker-fest.
...ellipsis |
pmart
Citizen
Username: Pmart
Post Number: 187
Registered: 7-2001
| | Posted on Friday, August 4, 2006 - 1:29 pm: |
|
OK, I don't usually do Soapbox, but let me take a shot at playing devil's advocate here.
Wasn't it the original poster in the party notice thread who was responsible for that thread morphing into an attack-fest? Although she started out with what seemed like a reasonable, validation-seeking question, it was her next post (when she went off on SIL) that switched the focus of the thread.
To me, the original intention of that thread was not straightforward. It seemed more like the intention was to post a rant on SIL, which is cool, than to request party invitation etiquette. That's probably why that particular thread went where it did. |
Closed: New threads not accepted on this page