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Message |
    
Maplewoody
Citizen
Username: Maplewoody
Post Number: 1103
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 21, 2005 - 10:59 pm: |     |
Top Ten Signs You're A Gay Cowboy
10. "Your saddle is Versace"
9. "Instead of 'Home On The Range', you sing 'It's Raining Men'"
8. "You enjoy ridin', ropin', and redecoratin'"
7. "Sold your livestock to buy tickets to 'Mamma Mia'"
6. "After watching reruns of 'Gunsmoke', you have to take a cold shower"
5. "Native Americans refer to you as 'Dances With Men'"
4. "You've been lassoed more times than most steers"
3. "You're wearing chaps, yet your 'ranch' is in Chelsea"
2. "Instead of a saloon you prefer a salon"
1. "You love riding, but you don't have a horse"
from David Letterman - The Late Show
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ajc
Citizen
Username: Ajc
Post Number: 4595
Registered: 9-2001
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 8:37 am: | |
...very funny, has to be high on the list of his best Top 10. |
Rick B
Citizen
Username: Ruck1977
Post Number: 944
Registered: 8-2003
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 8:47 am: | |
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Oscar Levant
Citizen
Username: Map_le_wood
Post Number: 45
Registered: 10-2003
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 7:36 pm: | |
Shouldn't number 9 be: "Homo on the range" ? |
aquaman
Supporter
Username: Aquaman
Post Number: 633
Registered: 8-2001
| | Posted on Thursday, December 22, 2005 - 8:25 pm: | |
I find this thread offensive.
As long as I'm already offended, don't forget "Bareback Mounting"
Damn you all. |
Tom Reingold
Supporter
Username: Noglider
Post Number: 11561
Registered: 1-2003
| | Posted on Friday, December 23, 2005 - 12:51 pm: | |
"Truck Drivin' Song"
I'm drivin' a truck
Drivin' a big ol' truck
Pedal to the metal, hope I don't run out of luck
Rollin' down the highway until the break of dawn
Drivin' a truck with my high heels on
My diesel rig is northward bound
It's time to put that hammer down
Just watchin' as the miles go flyin' by
I'm ridin' twenty tons of steel
But it's sure hard to hold the wheel
While I'm waiting for my nails to dry
Oh, I always gotta check my lipstick in that rear view mirror
And my pink angora sweater fits so tight
I'm jammin' gears and haulin' freight
Well, I sure hope my seams are straight
Lord, don't let my mascara run tonight
Because I'm drivin' a truck
Drivin' a big ol' truck
Smokey's on my tail and my accelerator's stuck
Got these eighteen wheels-a-rollin' until the break of dawn
Drivin' a truck with my high heels on
Oh, I don't mind when my crotchless panties creep right up on me
And my nipple rings don't bother me too much
But when I hit those big speed bumps
My darling little rhinestone pumps
Keep slippin' off the mother-lovin' clutch
But still I'm drivin' a truck
Drivin' a big ol' truck
Headin' down the interstate, just tryin' to make a buck
Wearin' feather boas with sequins and chiffon
While I'm drivin' a truck with my high heels on
I'm drivin' a truck
Drivin' a truck
Got a load to carry and some eyebrows left to pluck
And I'm late for my appointment down at my hair salon
So I'll be drivin' a truck with my high heels on
--WEIRD AL YANKOVIC
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Sgt. Pepper
Citizen
Username: Jjkatz
Post Number: 1545
Registered: 12-2003
| | Posted on Friday, December 23, 2005 - 3:24 pm: | |
I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK.... |
Brett Weir
Citizen
Username: Brett_weir
Post Number: 1129
Registered: 4-2004
| | Posted on Sunday, December 25, 2005 - 3:37 pm: | |
...let's do it doggie style, so we can both watch TV...
-Red Peters |
davidbuckley
Citizen
Username: Davidbuckley
Post Number: 474
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, January 1, 2006 - 5:32 pm: | |
Michael Musto, long may he wave, came up with a few LOL names for this movie. The one that really got me good was "Crouching Cowboy, Hidden Penis".
Laugh well, all.
David
Btw, I am quite sure it's a good movie even though I haven't seen it; I won't see it because I'm also sure it's VERY sad. |
knak
Citizen
Username: Knak
Post Number: 129
Registered: 5-2002
| | Posted on Monday, January 2, 2006 - 6:13 pm: | |
Just came home from watching Brokeback Mountain, and yes, it's very sad. True fated-to-love-the-unattainable love story. I can't imagine how anyone could think this would make anyone find it safer to be gay or for a man to express tender feelings about another man. And the jokes above feel way too much like the cowboy bar and threats of violence. (ok, I do know the thread was a joke lead)
But it is worth seeing. |
amandacat
Citizen
Username: Amandacat
Post Number: 964
Registered: 8-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 2, 2006 - 9:04 pm: | |
The movie is great -- Heath Ledger is amazing in the role of Ennis. But even moreso, the Annie Proulx story on which the movie was based is an absolute masterpiece -- the most powerful piece of short fiction I've ever read. Has anyone else here read it? |
doulamomma
Citizen
Username: Doulamomma
Post Number: 726
Registered: 3-2002
| | Posted on Monday, January 2, 2006 - 9:58 pm: | |
It was headache-inducing (from crying) sad, but really wonderful. |
Earlster
Supporter
Username: Earlster
Post Number: 1424
Registered: 8-2003
| | Posted on Monday, January 2, 2006 - 11:35 pm: | |
Letterman forgot the Miata. |
Maplewoody
Citizen
Username: Maplewoody
Post Number: 1118
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 2, 2006 - 11:41 pm: | |
I saw the movie this weekend, and thought it was good.
I didn't see that Heath gave a performance which he's getting rave reviews for.
He mumbled thru his lines,
and was hard to understand most of the time.
Now Jake....I'd give him my OSCAR anytime! |
CFA
Citizen
Username: Cfa
Post Number: 1540
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Thursday, January 5, 2006 - 4:57 am: | |
Or take his Oscar?  |
doulamomma
Citizen
Username: Doulamomma
Post Number: 754
Registered: 3-2002
| | Posted on Thursday, January 5, 2006 - 8:57 am: | |
Oscar giving aside, I thought Heath was hard to understand sometimes too... |
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