| Author | Message | ||
     Tinkrock Supporter Username: Tinkrock Post Number: 143 Registered: 3-2004  |
I've been meaning to do this for a while. I always think of it in the car, though. It's much easier to blog in my head in the car. I don't overthink things so much, then. It was my husband's and my 3rd anniversary two days ago. We haven't celebrated yet because we have 2 babies under two and no babysitter. I have got to find a babysitter. I am so amazingly lucky that I have the husband I do, and two gorgeous, happy babies. However, I am still toting around 20 excess baby pounds, sporting a gross home dye-job to cover the shockingly bad highlights I recently got. I am SO sick of stretch pants and looking like a schlubby frump. I have GOT to get new highlights! We've been in Maplewood for 2 years this month. And I still don't know anybody! Well, excepting a few neighbors. And two good friends who moved to SO just before we moved here, thank god. I should probably join the mothers' group. I'm really bad with stuff like that, though. I always feel so awkward, like everyone there already knows each other and I'm being intrusive. Which I know is absurd. But still. *sigh* I have got to get over myself! | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 2868 Registered: 8-2003  |
Happy Anniversary, Tinkrock and Mr. Tinkrock! someone once told me "ten on, ten off" I am guessing that also applies to "Twenty on, Twenty off" -- meaning, it might really take you almost 2 years to get back down to yor pre-baby weight. Don't beat yourself up. You'll get there. When I am home on maternity leave Jan - March I'd love to have a "taking-off-the-baby-weight buddy". You can also join the new mother group with me in January - I won't know anyone either! | ||
| Virtual It Girl Citizen Username: Shh Post Number: 5027 Registered: 5-2001 |
TinkRock, from all the fashion mags looks like stretch pants are back! Wear 'em in black with pointy flats and a tunic and you'll be the fashionista on the playground. I was never much of a joiner with new mommy things, but found I made lots of great friends when my kids started preschool, or other activities. If you are home or on a Saturday you can take a music or gym class and meet similar type moms. The other thing I found invaluable was joining a gym with babysitting. Not always easy to leave the house, but once you do it's a great way to leave the kids for an hour (even a half hour) and zone out on an elliptical or take a yoga class or something. If you go to a place like the Connection or Springfield or Summit Ys, they not only have babysitting free with family membership, but adult and toddler classes, so you can meet people, spend quality time with the kiddies, find a sitter and possibly lose weight/get in shape! It definitely kept me from going over the edge in those hectic toddler days when we had no schedule. | ||
| red Citizen Username: Redy67 Post Number: 7064 Registered: 2-2003  |
Tink--many of my best friends I met in my mother's group. Today all our kids are in first grade and still best of friends. That is a great way to get out and get connections in the community. Also, if you are feeling down about your weight there are several fitness centers in the area that have BABYSITTING!!! When I had my second I found this to be my greatest sanity. Every morning I would wake up with the kids, go to the gym, put the kids in babysitting, and worked out for a little over an hour. It was great way to start the day, loose that extra weight, and have a little sanity at the same time! | ||
| Jersey_Boy Citizen Username: Jersey_boy Post Number: 1836 Registered: 1-2006  |
I bit the bullet and went to a F2F. I have met some really cool people through MOL and then met cool people through these contacts (people who don't post on MOL  ) I've only been in town (South Orange) one year and I feel like a local. These two towns are filled with great people. Just show up somewhere and be friendly. I can tell from your posts, you'll be fine. I look forward to meeting you. BTW, you had me at "tinkrock," awesome username. J.B. | ||
| Tinkrock Supporter Username: Tinkrock Post Number: 144 Registered: 3-2004 |
Thanks, everyone! Pippi, I heard something similar, "nine on, nine off", meaning,apparently, it took me 9 months to put the weight on, it will take me 9 months to get it off. I kinda hate that timeline, but it's infinitely preferable to 20 on, 20 off!  VIG and red, I did look into the gym with babysitting after #1 was born, but then dropped the ball on that. I should consider it again. Right now I'm back doing Slim in 6, which I also did when #1 was 6 months old, and worked like a charm. It's a bit harder to squeeze in with 2 kids now, though. Fortunately, my sainted hubby is really great about helping me make time. (I also promised him that I would spend lots of time on this praising his myriad wonderful qualities, as per his request  ). J.B., Thanks for the compliment! And I know you're right about the people, I'm sure there are many great folks out there. It's weird though. A while back one of our neighbors had a party, and we basically knew no one. Some people were very friendly. Others, we'd go up to, say "hi", and get maybe a smile and nothing else in return. I mean, all our kids were running around, it was outside, not like a cocktail party in someone's house where it would be SUPER weird to be ignored, but disconcerting nonetheless. My husband is much more gregarious than I am, and even he was getting the cold shoulder, so I don't think it's just me being paranoid, which may be my tendency. But we'll figure it out, I'm sure. I hope! Thanks for the encouragement. OK: is this just my sick husband and myself, or do you often imagine horrible things happening to your children and/or spouse? Last night, for instance, I was trying to go to sleep, and I could not get the image of my baby girl choking out of my head. I have an absolute horror of choking, which you would think would have prompted me to finally take that baby CPR course, but no. I just picture my girl choking and imagining that I can't dislodge it. It's incredibly disturbing. My husband does similar things all the time, it's gross. I wonder if it's just feeling a bit helpless in the face of all the horrible things that could potentially happen. Sometimes it seems like a wonder that anyone's alive at all! My husband says he was never afraid of death until we had kids. I was, but I know what he means. It's so much worse, the thought of leaving them without a parent. My mother's first husband was at a diner waiting for takeout when he dropped dead of a heart attack at 26. My mom was 24. She had an 18 month old and a 6 month old. The thought of that freezes my blood these days. The weirdest thing , the most awful thing, my sisters just, of course, have no memory of him. I look at my daughter now, the same age as my oldest sister then, and how much she loves her daddy, how much fun they have, and if anything happened to him, poof. She'd never even know how much she once loved him. Just writing it makes me want to cry. And I think of this stuff all the time. |
