| Author |
Message |
    
Joan
Citizen
Username: Joancrystal
Post Number: 1305
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 11:08 am: |     |
The regular posters on Please Help and Home Fix-it need our help. Their homes are being invaded by squirrels and they just don't know how to evict them. Animal Control is useless. Traditional approaches such as using traps, stuffing the soffits with moth balls, turning up the volume on their ultrasonic devices, beaning the squirrels on the head with well aimed acorns, and inviting MEM over for dinner just aren't working. This calls for a little Virtual Cafe ingenuity.
What would suggest?
Here are a few ideas to get the discussion rolling:
1. Fully enclose the house in smooth glass panels. Those squirrels will need suction cups to climb up to their doorways.
2. Build the squirrels a nice split level nest in a nearby unoccupied tree. Line it with fiberglass insulation for warmth. Add a year's supply of acorns as a house warming gift.
3. Report the Squirrel family to the new apartment inspector. See how long the Squirrels can afford to pay the thousand dollar a day fine for occupying an illegal apartment.
P.S.: Anyone wishing to take the squirrel's side in this discussion is welcome to start a parallel thread in Soapbox.
|
#9Dream
Citizen
Username: 9dream
Post Number: 44
Registered: 12-2002
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 1:51 pm: | |
If it turns out you can't beat 'em:
Count the number of squirrels (estimate if necessary) and write them off as dependents on your income tax this spring. |
nan
Citizen
Username: Nan
Post Number: 704
Registered: 2-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 3:58 pm: | |
Well, as I've said on this subject before, it's time to call in THE NORTH TERRACE CATS. These are the fiercest feline prowlers in all of M/SO. These cats eat dogs for breakfast and spit the bones down the cellar. These cats purr like Harley Davidsons. These cats would rather claw out your eyeballs than say good morning. They take no guff, especially from a puny squirrel.
I'm not sure about per diem expenses or billing practices though. They might not be cheap. |
#9Dream
Citizen
Username: 9dream
Post Number: 45
Registered: 12-2002
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 4:23 pm: | |
Hey Nan, I think I found a picture of them organizing a hunt:
 |
ken
Citizen
Username: Ken
Post Number: 101
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 4:34 pm: | |
 |
nan
Citizen
Username: Nan
Post Number: 707
Registered: 2-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 4:37 pm: | |
Yeah, I think the yellow one is "Cookie." Supposedly Cookie is the leader. Since I live on the street below, I'm not that knowleable about their exact organizational structure. Maybe some of the NT residents can fill us in with more details.
post edited (after crossing posts with the squirrel picture) to add....Oh my! |
Chris Dickson
Citizen
Username: Ironman
Post Number: 406
Registered: 8-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 7:20 pm: | |
The only good squirrel is a dead squirrel. I hate the little buggers ... |
sbenois
Citizen
Username: Sbenois
Post Number: 880
Registered: 10-2001
| | Posted on Monday, January 20, 2003 - 9:06 pm: | |
Jeez. Wouldya look at that squirrel's nuts! |
bets
Citizen
Username: Bets
Post Number: 259
Registered: 6-2001
| | Posted on Thursday, January 23, 2003 - 11:11 am: | |
 |
ml1
Citizen
Username: Ml1
Post Number: 559
Registered: 5-2002
| | Posted on Thursday, January 23, 2003 - 11:20 am: | |
hmm, Bud seems more fit for animal than for human consumption. Their commercials always seem to feature critters-- ants, lizards, frogs, ferrets, etc.
Now squirrels! |
Closed: New threads not accepted on this page