| Author |
Message |
    
sportsnut
Citizen
Username: Sportsnut
Post Number: 686
Registered: 10-2001
| | Posted on Friday, November 7, 2003 - 2:55 pm: |     |
When playing baseball in your backyard it is not advisable to keep your eyes on the ball when you use trees as bases.
Eight stitches and a trip to the plastic surgeon. |
Dave Ross
Supporter
Username: Dave
Post Number: 5635
Registered: 4-1998
| | Posted on Friday, November 7, 2003 - 3:45 pm: | |
There are reasons why the pitcher's mound is 60' away from the plate. Reflexes aren't that fast in reacting to line drives after delivery. Bruised thigh for 2 weeks. No more baseball on softball fields. |
silkcity
Citizen
Username: Silkcity
Post Number: 161
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Saturday, November 8, 2003 - 9:01 am: | |
Childbirth without painkillers. Don't believe the hype. (Hey, I take advil for a headache...why did I think labor without anything would sound reasonable?)
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jgberkeley
Supporter
Username: Jgberkeley
Post Number: 3286
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Saturday, November 8, 2003 - 7:33 pm: | |
When it is just the spouse and you, order only one meal from Burnett BBQ. |
imacgrandma
Citizen
Username: Imacgrandma
Post Number: 180
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 1:53 pm: | |
When you're feeding a tie for a seat cushion thru the sewing machine, don't look up to speak with someone. |
Joan
Citizen
Username: Joancrystal
Post Number: 2123
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 2:42 pm: | |
Don't volunteer to do something no one else wants to do and then expect to get volunteers to help you do it. |
deborahg
Citizen
Username: Deborahg
Post Number: 712
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 3:06 pm: | |
Don't let your two-year-old get his own water -- unless you're okay with him drinking from the dog's bowl.
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Marvin Gardens
Citizen
Username: Marvin_gardens
Post Number: 1
Registered: 11-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 7:40 pm: | |
Don't assume, actually look to make sure the bread is not moldy before you take the third bite....
_______________
Do Not Pass Go
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bpaandco
Citizen
Username: Bpaandco
Post Number: 46
Registered: 9-2003
| | Posted on Sunday, November 9, 2003 - 9:30 pm: | |
Never take your child'd word for it (no matter how old they are) that the dog poop in the back yard is cleaned up when mowing the lawn. |
greenetree
Supporter
Username: Greenetree
Post Number: 1815
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2003 - 12:43 am: | |
Don't promise your spouse that you will take the soup off the stove in half an hour when you are working on a big presentation that is due in the morning.
30 minutes later, 3 hours later. Can I say I got my "3's" mixed up? |
Crazyguggenheim
Citizen
Username: Crazyguggenheim
Post Number: 463
Registered: 2-2002
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2003 - 8:39 am: | |
If there is an ant problem in your kitchen, never eat the cake left out on the counter late at night without turning on the light.
Call me crazy |
jro
Citizen
Username: Jro
Post Number: 27
Registered: 8-2002
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2003 - 12:44 pm: | |
Don't feed your 6 month old child while dressed to go out (work clothes, dressy clothes, etc.) No matter how careful you think you are, you may extend your hand to shake someone elses and find dried squash up and down your sleeve. |
mem
Citizen
Username: Mem
Post Number: 2219
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2003 - 1:26 pm: | |
Never, ever chug a glass of red wine after unsuccessfully trying to locate the cigarette butt that went flying out of your hand previously.
Yuck! |
Joan
Citizen
Username: Joancrystal
Post Number: 2128
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Monday, November 10, 2003 - 8:39 pm: | |
It's a lot easier to get your feet into your shoes after you untie the laces. |
Lydia
Citizen
Username: Lydial
Post Number: 174
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, November 12, 2003 - 5:41 pm: | |
Don't leave your husband watching a three-year-old during the playoffs.
Or at least make sure scissors are out of reach of said three-year-old if you do. |
Marvin Gardens
Citizen
Username: Marvin_gardens
Post Number: 7
Registered: 11-2003
| | Posted on Thursday, November 13, 2003 - 8:18 am: | |
When you decide to buy twelve cans of tuna because they are on sale, make sure the label doesn't say "in oil".
_______________
Do Not Pass Go |
Wilkanoid
Citizen
Username: Cseleosida
Post Number: 85
Registered: 10-2002
| | Posted on Monday, December 1, 2003 - 1:15 pm: | |
Check whether the holiday lights work before you hang them on the roof |
Marvin Gardens
Citizen
Username: Marvin_gardens
Post Number: 20
Registered: 11-2003
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 2, 2003 - 3:11 pm: | |
Make sure L'il Elvis is safely tucked away BEFORE you zip up
_______________
Do Not Pass Go |
apm
Citizen
Username: Apm
Post Number: 149
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 2, 2003 - 10:22 pm: | |
If something seems too good to be true, it is. |
Ignatius J
Citizen
Username: Ignatius_j
Post Number: 129
Registered: 8-2003
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 3, 2003 - 7:58 am: | |
Turn off the water to the outside hose before it goes down to ninteen degrees...
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greenetree
Supporter
Username: Greenetree
Post Number: 1847
Registered: 5-2001
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 3, 2003 - 9:45 am: | |
Close your eyes if you have to sneeze before your mascara is dry.  |
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