More Multicultural Humor Log Out | Lost Password? | Topics | Search
Contact | Register | My Profile | SO home | MOL home

M-SO Message Board » 2005 Attic » Virtual Cafe » Archive through June 4, 2005 » Archive through February 5, 2005 » More Multicultural Humor « Previous Next »

  Thread Originator Last Poster Posts Pages Last Post
  ClosedClosed: New threads not accepted on this page          

Author Message
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message

Soda
Supporter
Username: Soda

Post Number: 2463
Registered: 5-2001


Posted on Wednesday, February 2, 2005 - 10:15 am:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

(Again, no authorship implied...)

THOUGHTS OF A JEWISH BUDDHIST

1. Let your mind be as a floating cloud.
Let your stillness be as the wooded glen.
And sit up straight. You'll never meet the
Buddha with such round shoulders.

2. There is no escaping karma.
In a previous life, you never called,
you never wrote, you never visited.
And whose fault was that?

3. Wherever you go, there you are.
Your luggage is another story.

4. To practice Zen and the art of Jewish
motorcycle maintenance, do the following:
get rid of the motorcycle. What were you thinking?

5. Be aware of your body. Be aware of your
perceptions. Keep in mind that not every physical
sensation is a symptom of a terminal illness.

6. If there is no self, whose arthritis is this?

7. Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget this and attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems.

8. The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands
nothing of others. The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides.
The Tao is not Jewish.

9. Drink tea and nourish life. With the first sip, happiness. With the second, satisfaction. With the third, Danish.

10. The Buddha taught that one should practice loving kindness to all sentient beings. Still, would it kill you to find a nice sentient being who happens to be Jewish?

11. Be patient and achieve all things. Be impatient and achieve all things faster.

12. To Find the Buddha, look within. Deep inside you are ten thousand flowers. Each flower blossoms ten thousand times. Each blossom has ten thousand petals.
You might want to see a specialist.

13. Be here now. Be someplace else later.
Is that so complicated?

14. Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain
nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkes!!

15. Lose yourself. Feel not the cold. Feel not the wind. But don't be such a bigshot. Bring a sweater.
Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message

greenetree
Supporter
Username: Greenetree

Post Number: 3804
Registered: 5-2001


Posted on Wednesday, February 2, 2005 - 10:34 am:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Top of pagePrevious messageNext messageBottom of page Link to this message

kathy
Citizen
Username: Kathy

Post Number: 1048
Registered: 5-2001
Posted on Wednesday, February 2, 2005 - 12:15 pm:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

"The Torah says, 'Love thy neighbor as thyself.' The Buddha says there is no 'self'. So maybe you are off the hook."

Words to live by, indeed. Also (as all of the above) by David M. Bader, from Zen Judaism.

Topics | Last Day | Last Week | Tree View | Search | User List | Help/Instructions | Credits Administration