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D.
Moderator
Username: Dave

Post Number: 5468
Registered: 4-1998


Posted on Friday, March 4, 2005 - 8:06 am:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)


quote:

Preamble


Destroying the Earth is harder than you may have been led to believe.


You've seen the action movies where the bad guy threatens to destroy the Earth. You've heard people on the news claiming that the next nuclear war or cutting down rainforests or persisting in releasing hideous quantities of pollution into the atmosphere threatens to end the world.


Fools.


The Earth was built to last. It is a 4,550,000,000-year-old, 5,973,600,000,000,000,000,000-tonne ball of iron. It has taken more devastating asteroid hits in its lifetime than you've had hot dinners, and lo, it still orbits merrily. So my first piece of advice to you, dear would-be Earth-destroyer, is: do NOT think this will be easy.


This is not a guide for wusses whose aim is merely to wipe out humanity. I (Sam Hughes) can in no way guarantee the complete extinction of the human race via any of these methods, real or imaginary. Humanity is wily and resourceful, and many of the methods outlined below will take many years to even become available, let alone implement, by which time mankind may well have spread to other planets; indeed, other star systems. If total human genocide is your ultimate goal, you are reading the wrong document. There are far more efficient ways of doing this, many which are available and feasible RIGHT NOW. Nor is this a guide for those wanting to annihilate everything from single-celled life upwards, render Earth uninhabitable or simply conquer it. These are trivial goals in comparison.


This is a guide for those who do not want the Earth to be there anymore.




http://ned.ucam.org/~sdh31/misc/destroy.html
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monster
Supporter
Username: Monster

Post Number: 611
Registered: 7-2002


Posted on Friday, March 4, 2005 - 1:51 pm:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I like #9, Pulverized by impact with blunt instrument
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Michael Janay
Citizen
Username: Childprotect

Post Number: 1653
Registered: 1-2003


Posted on Friday, March 4, 2005 - 3:26 pm:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Why was "Drive an SUV" not an option?

But I did love the last entry in the "things that will not work" section.
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D.
Moderator
Username: Dave

Post Number: 5483
Registered: 4-1998


Posted on Friday, March 4, 2005 - 4:48 pm:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

go back and check the entry for "Eaten by von Neumann machines" (#10). I'm sure SUVs could be retrofitted for this.
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Carrie Avery
Citizen
Username: Carrie33

Post Number: 164
Registered: 1-2005


Posted on Saturday, March 5, 2005 - 8:06 am:   Edit PostDelete PostPrint Post   Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Recently, I have read that they are cutting back on making SUV's., thankgod.
The option of "Natural Decay" sounds realistic, to a degree.

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