| Author | Message | ||
     bets Supporter Username: Bets Post Number: 2143 Registered: 6-2001  |
I say let Ernie at the cicada! We'll call that bug S! | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 253 Registered: 10-2003 |
Like your logic, Bets! Although, I must say, having seen S at the attorney meeting last week, I'd have to say that a crunched up cicada is probably in a better place than he is. Tom, did the cicada buzz around, or did she stun it with one swipe like a mouse? | ||
| Nonymous Reingold Supporter Username: Noglider Post Number: 8581 Registered: 1-2003  |
She batted it a little and bit it and dropped it. Repeated this about three times until she swallowed it. Last summer, I brought her big moths. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 254 Registered: 10-2003 |
I don't get the optimal-cat-fun-bugs in my apartment like I did in the house - just an occasional ant or silverfish. This cicada on the screen is the most exciting thing to happen since the rats invaded our basement last fall. (My, I seem to have had a lot of rats in my life this past year...) (...but not anymore!) | ||
| Meandtheboys Citizen Username: Meandtheboys Post Number: 1268 Registered: 12-2004  |
las, you shouldn't insult poor innocent rats by comparing them to your ex! | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 4818 Registered: 5-2001  |
Um, how do I put this delicately? What does the cicada look like on the other end? Doesn't the hard shell hurt the cat's GI system? | ||
| Nonymous Reingold Supporter Username: Noglider Post Number: 8587 Registered: 1-2003 |
That never occurred to me. I would assume her stomach acid could decompose it. Here she is on our porch.  | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 255 Registered: 10-2003 |
Meand: I can't tolerate the word 'ex'! I consider myself to be widowed. You see, my husband had an eating disorder and his heart failed. It happens, it's true, no lies, no slander. Greenie: It has to get digested, right? Do you really think it comes out as a whole cicada again? Do you sh*t slices of pizza? | ||
| Meandtheboys Citizen Username: Meandtheboys Post Number: 1270 Registered: 12-2004 |
Perfect las. You have such a way with words! From now on I will refer to him as "your late husband." | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1063 Registered: 8-2003  |
Las - you are truly an inspiration. It's so easy for us to sit here and tell you what you should do to get over your pain. Some of us have offered words of wisdom with hindsight and experience, but none of us truly presently living with what you've been living with. We assured you you'll feel better, but you can't really believe it, can't really trust it, until you begin to see it with your very own eyes. Go ahead. Read your blog from the beginning and see how far you've come. I think the worst is over....I hope you think so, too. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1625 Registered: 9-2003  |
las, I think your whole "widowed" approach is way cool. Lots of societies shun, or consider deceased, those who violate their most important rules. Makes a mess of sense. Now if only you could convince any insurance companies....! | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 260 Registered: 10-2003 |
Meand, Pippi, CG - you are the best! Reading your words makes me see why I bullied my way into your lives. And CG: Shouldn't you be sleeping at 5:07 am?... | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1064 Registered: 8-2003 |
...and we wouldn't have it any other way!!  | ||
| Meandtheboys Citizen Username: Meandtheboys Post Number: 1290 Registered: 12-2004 |
...and you most certainly did not "bully." Matter of fact I believe you utterly incapable of such a thing! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1628 Registered: 9-2003 |
las, I am by tendency a farmer these days. Early to bed (often asleep by 10), early to rise. The rest of that isn't working out so hot, but I am UP! | ||
| redY67 Citizen Username: Redy67 Post Number: 2693 Registered: 2-2003  |
How nice tho cyn! I love early morning. It is quite and serene that time of day... | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 266 Registered: 10-2003 |
Monday I signed my divorce complaint, no big deal. Just received a copy in the mail (as submitted to the Court) and wow. WOW. I am filing for divorce. Divorce. Married the man of my dreams who promised he would always be there. He took me away in December to celebrate the end of a tough semester. Wrote on my ninth anniversary card that the only thing better than our ninth anniversary will be our tenth. Told me we are best when we are together. The night he ran away he had in his bag my birthday card and gift: a book on moss gardening. Yeah, he must have hated me so much. I don't miss him after all the crap he's pulled but I miss my life. I miss my beautiful home that another family will be moving into next week. I miss my garden. I miss all the things I didn't bring with me to my new place because they weren't essesntial and that he sold without my permission. I miss having someone to take my gallons of water in from the car. I miss having someone to get tangled up with in bed. I miss knitting on the couch with someone's feet on my lap. I miss feeling a man's weight on my chest. I miss having someone to email with a million times a day, sharing every little experience. I miss having someone to buy me a moss gardening book for my birthday. You know, I didn't get a single birthday card this year. The entire world knows my husband ran away on my 37th birthday, and not a single person got me a card. Or a present. (I don't mean MOLers.) Never even got the moss gardening book and card he later told me he'd been carrying around for weeks. Maybe I'll just stay 36 and just start again next year. And you know, just a few days before my birthday I was in Florida visiting my sister. I was going to pick up Cuban food to bring home to him. He wrote me: "Via con dios, my darling." All the people who told me I'll have good days and bad, two steps forward one step back, hackney, hackney, hackney. I'm having a bad moment and I no longer have my best friend to help me through it, so I post in this virtual world for virtual release. I used to have the most awesome life - it wasn't perfect, but I really liked where I was. | ||
| redY67 Citizen Username: Redy67 Post Number: 2697 Registered: 2-2003 |
las you will get there again. You have a beautiful spirit, I know you will be in better place than you were with him. | ||
| shh Citizen Username: Shh Post Number: 2841 Registered: 5-2001 |
Las, I wish I could understand why he did what he did. I think looking at it like a death could be kind of healthy. I remember a colleague of my husband's passed away at a relatively young age, and at his funeral many people spoke about how he enriched their lives. His daughter, who was in her mid 20s and newly pregnant told everyone about some of their rituals as father and daughter. There was not a dry eye in the place. I love my own dad but never had the kind of experiences she had. My feeling were, for 25 years, she was very lucky to have been daddy's girl. Better than having a miserable dad til she was 60. It sounds like your relationship was good for many years, then that man died. The man who left you cannot be this man. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 268 Registered: 10-2003 |
Thanks, redY. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 4821 Registered: 5-2001 |
Las- a silly thought. Why don't you throw yourself a belated birthday party? I know a bunch of us will come. Just this morning, I said to TS that when mom comes to visit us (I hope in September) that I want to have a belated birthday dinner for her. She had been planning her birthday dinner menu, but wasn't able to eat it last week. So, we'll do it in September. I think you should do it! Take back your day! | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 269 Registered: 10-2003 |
Geez, Greenetree, can't a girl feel sorry for herself without someone coming up with an ideal solution? Truth is, I usually only got one card anyway (from S), so I guess I didn't really lose out. You know, he hated his birthday, too, stemming from childhood issues, so our rule was to provide each other with lists of gifts so that we would be sure not to disappoint one another. For his birthday last November he chose a grind and brew coffee pot, and not knowing precisely which model or color, I bought four of them from Williams Sonoma in Upper Montclair (en route to school). Put over $1000 worth of coffee pots on my credit card so that he could have them all, try them all, and not end up disappointed on his big day (days were getting shorter, his seasonal depression was setting in, so why risk a disappointment?). Turns out the one we had made the best coffee, so I had to return them all, one by one en route to class for the next two weeks. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 4822 Registered: 5-2001 |
Well, now that you ask, no.  You are soooo liberated! Think of all the energy you have back that you can put into something else (like yourself). I used to hate Sundays, which is worse than hating your birthday because they come around more often. Childhood issues - my parents used to spend the day at each others' throats until they finally got divorced. In my mid-twenties, I took back my Sundays by forcing myself to do an activity that I liked. After awhile, it became a habit and something I looked forward to. In the summer, I would rent one of those paddle boats in Prospect Park & go out into the middle of the lake with a cup of coffee and the Sunday Times. It was also part of taking back my life after becoming newly single. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 272 Registered: 10-2003 |
Hey, shh, I didn't see your post in there. I agree - that's why I say he died from heart failure. The heart of the man I loved could never have done this. I also know that the man who did this must hate himself so very much - thinks he's so worthless he wouldn't be missed. (Dare I say, leave me on my birthday then f*ck me enough times and no, you won't be missed...) | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1066 Registered: 8-2003 |
I'd come to a belated birthday party for you, las! give yourself a virtual hug today. I think you need one. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 273 Registered: 10-2003 |
I just went across to Century 21 and bought myself a new bra. I might stop by later to pick up another one it feels so good. Oddly, Pippi, it feels like a virtual hug. | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1067 Registered: 8-2003 |
 well, something's being hugged | ||
| mem Citizen Username: Mem Post Number: 5197 Registered: 5-2001  |
I say we're due for another get together. How about next Saturday night at my house? | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 274 Registered: 10-2003 |
Well, okay, Mem. But none of them evil drinks you're so fond of. You don't need alcohol to have a good time.  | ||
| mem Citizen Username: Mem Post Number: 5199 Registered: 5-2001 |
Since when? | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 4824 Registered: 5-2001 |
Are we talking August 6? TS will bake the B-day cake. Although I did say that I'd host the next one.....  | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 276 Registered: 10-2003 |
Birthday cake? Puhlease! Self-pity was SO mid-morning. This is just a get together. | ||
| mem Citizen Username: Mem Post Number: 5200 Registered: 5-2001 |
August 6th. I like b'day cake, and alcohol! But LAS I could have soda, etc. too. Should we open it up to guys as well? | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1070 Registered: 8-2003 |
hey - I'd like to come to las' belated birthday party. May I invite myself?  | ||
| mem Citizen Username: Mem Post Number: 5202 Registered: 5-2001 |
Pippi - of course! If anyone else is interested, please PL me for my address. | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2435 Registered: 9-2003 |
Man. I keep missing out on these things.. have another birthday party to attend next Saturday. Las - have a wonderous time - you deserve to be the honored guest (even if the moment has passed). Birthday Cake and Champagne for everyone!! | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 277 Registered: 10-2003 |
Mem: - No soda (you meant the beverage not the MOLer?) - Yes guys - Yes Pippi SOL: - If you REALLY felt sorry for me you diss your prior obligations and get tanqued with us... | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1071 Registered: 8-2003 |
Thanks! what fun! | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2436 Registered: 9-2003 |
Would that I could Las... would that I could. | ||
| Just The Aunt Supporter Username: Auntof13 Post Number: 1926 Registered: 1-2004  |
Las- I give you so much credit! With all you've been through you've kept a sense of humor! |
