| Author | Message | ||
     wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1666 Registered: 5-2001 |
Mazel tov. And my continued good thoughts to your mom. And Cynicalgirl...Milkey Ways are the way to go. Hope the visit showed improvement. | ||
| sac Supporter Username: Sac Post Number: 2629 Registered: 5-2001 |
Oreos are good too. We're pulling for (all of) you. | ||
| Lucy Supporter Username: Lucy Post Number: 1027 Registered: 5-2005  |
Greentree the power of prayer love and the best sense of humor. Celebrate and enjoy this well earned moment Brilliant!! | ||
| redY67 Citizen Username: Redy67 Post Number: 3408 Registered: 2-2003  |
Greenetree, I am so happy for your mom (and you of course)  | ||
| Debby Citizen Username: Debby Post Number: 2030 Registered: 5-2001 |
Greenetree - so happy for your amazing news. Cyn- so sorry for the rough road you are travelling right now. Has the day-to-day been a bit easier with Spongebob in the hospital? Has it been respite for you, or an additional scheduling burden? I haven't been around since my trip to NY. Will fill in the details later, but will let you all know that my father was much better than I anticipated, and absolutely knew who I was and was happy to have me there. I have no idea how my mom is still functioning, being there 11 hours a day, 7 days a week, without so much as a lunch break. I did the routine with her for 4 days and it was mind-numbingly exhausting. Thank you to Tom and Cyn, and all who gave me the pre-visit encouragement I needed and the perspective I needed with my kid. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 5399 Registered: 5-2001  |
Debby - I'm so glad he knew you and you feel good about the visit. I have to give you all a brief description of everyone's reaction: Greenemom: "Now Poptart Guy is going to start nagging me to drive to Chicago" Me: "I can't believe that you just got the most amazing news of your life & you still managed to find something to complain about". At least she laughed & said "not really". Normal guy: "That's great! I gotta run to court. Have a great vacation". Obviously, now that things have normalized a bit, he doesn't need to call me every day anymore. Baby Brother: Did the doctor seem surprised? Is this really unusual? Has Normal Bro talked to her yet about sorting out the finances & her medical bills? No, I think we can give that one a little time. Poptart Guy: Grilled me about whether the doctor said this was 'unusual' or if he seemed surprised. A common theme, apparently. Not sure why, but I guess they are afraid to believe it. He also got a choked up & asked if I'd talked to mom about taking life easier & quitting her job. Not yet. I fished around it last weekend, but she got annoyed. She's too busy enjoying feeling like herself. OK - I can respect that. I asked her if she'd at least spend more time with her grandkids now. I really need to shut the hell up. We all, & especially mom, need to digest this whole adventure. And remember that we are not completely out of the woods yet. Mom told me later that Poptart Guy told his wife that she was in 'remission'. Mom asked me if the doc used the word 'remission'. No, he didn't. I think it has to be a certain length of time & you still have this course of chemo to finish. But, why not expect it? The reaction of people at work when I told them the doc said they saw no sign of the tumor? Shocked looks on faces, spreading into wide grins and hugs. One "makes you question the original diagnosis". I'm not gonna do that, tho. I'd hate to think that she went through all this because she actually had a phlegm ball stuck.  I probably won't get a chance to say 'bye before we leave. So, I go off on vacation with a big smile. Bye. | ||
| redY67 Citizen Username: Redy67 Post Number: 3429 Registered: 2-2003 |
Green, have a wonderful time you deserve it! | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1264 Registered: 8-2003  |
hope it's the most relaxing, carefree vacation of your life! | ||
| Virtual It Girl Citizen Username: Shh Post Number: 3239 Registered: 5-2001 |
Yay!  | ||
| bets Supporter Username: Bets Post Number: 2378 Registered: 6-2001  |
So, so happy for you Greenie! | ||
| Joan Supporter Username: Joancrystal Post Number: 6318 Registered: 5-2001 |
Greenetree: I'm so glad your mother has received this wonderful news. Enjoy your vacation and give yourself a chance to concentrate on you for a change. You deserve it! | ||
| wbwallflower Citizen Username: Wbwallflower Post Number: 201 Registered: 7-2005 |
SO SO happy for you greene.. some prayers really do get answered! | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 5412 Registered: 5-2001 |
Weird... I'm an atheist....  I have to share this, 'cause it's funny. I am almost finished packing. Ugh. I can pack for a business trip in 10 minutes. Vacation is another story. Back to the funny... Mom is bitching (I doubt I'll break the habit of calling her everyday anytime soon) about something or another. So, I finally say "You know those movies you see on Angst TV (aka Lifetime)? The ones where the heroine narrowly escapes death and has an epiphany and becomes a joyous, serene person"? She knew just where I was going. "Don't count on it, 'cause it ain't gonna happen". "Well I wish you'd told me before we went to so much trouble to try and cure your •••". We are both giddy. Earlier, I'd told her that I had put her cardiologist on a payment plan. She said "I can pay my own bills". Mom, what's wrong with a payment plan? I don't know. It just seems... wrong. OK. You owe him $1400. A payment plan will be just fine. I am going to pack now. Very tired. Remember underwear, remember underwear, remember underwear.... Have a good week, all. | ||
| Debby Citizen Username: Debby Post Number: 2035 Registered: 5-2001 |
Did you remember the underwear? | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1826 Registered: 9-2003  |
Well, he's not good, really, and no one knows why. Has had abdominal CAT, head CAT. Today, hopefully, an MRI. He's doing some things that make them fear neurological damage, or cancer advancement, or...who the helle knows. I've put off posting cuz I've been running around and I'm so depressed. They're taking everything seriously so no doubts on that score. Fluids, liquid food. Antibiotics. Various levels of this and that better. Catheter. Mentally he's like a person who's sort of there when I talk to him. Trouble speaking, tongue coordination. Oxegen good, but most of the time make these "fish mouth" gestures that are usually related to oxegen starvation. Just bluer than blue, sadder than sad. No one knows, they're just scanning and scoping and testing. Could be permanent state, could be a downward slide, could be a way station on the way back. I crawl into bed with him in the hospital and talk to him. He acknowleges, and talks back as best he can. This sucks. | ||
| wbwallflower Citizen Username: Wbwallflower Post Number: 205 Registered: 7-2005 |
Cyn - so sorry to hear things suck right now.. please let us know if there's anything we can do for you or your daughter to make things just a little easier where we can. Praying for you and your family.. | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1274 Registered: 8-2003 |
cynicalgirl - I am really sorry things suck so bad right now. You are in my thoughts. I hope things get better real soon. | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2611 Registered: 9-2003 |
cyn- I'm so very sorry to hear this - sending prayers and good thoughts for strength - hang in there. | ||
| Debby Citizen Username: Debby Post Number: 2040 Registered: 5-2001 |
cyn - I'm so sorry for the recent changes. I hope it changes course soon, and that things get easier. Praying for you. Love, Deb | ||
| Joan Supporter Username: Joancrystal Post Number: 6330 Registered: 5-2001 |
Cynical Girl: What the others said. My prayers are with you for Curt's full and speedy recovery. | ||
| marian Citizen Username: Marian Post Number: 727 Registered: 9-2001 |
Cyn, I'm thinking about you and sending positive vibes. Hang in there. Love, Marian | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 444 Registered: 10-2003 |
Crawling into bed with him - in a perverse way, it is an intimacy that you will always hold dear. I'm glad you can do that. -Lynn | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1828 Registered: 9-2003 |
Up and at 'em here. I had written a post last night, but I seem to have neglected to actually hit the right key at the right time so it never appeared. Kid and I went in last night and had some decent interaction with him. Decent means getting him to open his eyes and look at us, talk, ask questions and get logical, engaged responses. He does have difficulty articulating, like his tongue is not working terribly well. I do get him mad, and I'm ok with that. Now, the nurses invoke my name, or better yet our daughter's name, a a motivator or authority who says he must do whatever. Made my rounds of the cancer boards this a.m. I tell you, what he seems like is drugged, like a person on downers. He's on some minimal level of Fentanyl patch for his pain. And, of course, his body has been on a course of FULFOX for awhile now an effects accumulate. One of the more annoying ones is peripheral neuropathy (tingling and other sensitivities to extremities). I find myself wondering whether the tongue can count as an extremity. Oh well. I blew off a lot of science in college, and this isn't the time to play Lorenzo's Oil (even though one does). He gets an MRI of the old head this morning. Having just talked to the nurses and learned his night was OK, I'm going to go to take the kid to school and go to work. Leave early. Posting here is a great outlet. So hard though, cuz I'm afraid to post anything positive and then potentially have to read it later when/if everything goes south. A lot of me just wants to go off to the woods like a wounded animal and be unobserved in my pain. But then, the more social part of me needs witnesses/participants. What can I say? Yes, pray, focus energy, contact the earth mother anything that might help. Curt has always liked women, I mean really liked them. He was always the guy in the office that women could talk to, not in a yecky Alan Alda way, but nice. He can be kind of quiet and thoughtful, but he's like a quiet cowboy/big brother. He never commits the sin of telling you what to do, or trying to solve the problem without listening. Sometimes he's kind of like the guy in Being There, when I feel like arguing or similar. He's just very, very centered and has a sense of right and wrong that is neither Democrat nor Republican, just sort of common sense. Still waters run deep there. Please, make them keep running ... | ||
| Meandtheboys Citizen Username: Meandtheboys Post Number: 1626 Registered: 12-2004  |
Hoping things get better for all of you. Sounds like a great guy. | ||
| buzzsaw Citizen Username: Buzzsaw Post Number: 2678 Registered: 5-2001  |
I second that. Hang in there Cynicalgirl. It isn't easy, I'm sure. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1830 Registered: 9-2003 |
Well, they did the MRI and of course no results till tomorrow or so. SILLY ME! I didn't account for delay, thinking that everyone would be pressing on this as if cynicalboy were a president or something, but... The good news is that tonight we went in and he was much chattier, not just us dragging it out of him. Plus, his speech was way clearer. His tongue didn't seem messed up. We talked about how he didn't remember anything much from last week, at all. So, he was a lot himself, starting conversation, following it and such. Kid put some rap stuff on on the radio on the way home and I didn't even mind! Could have been talking about ho's (sp?) and freebasing, or crack or whatever the heck it is. I didn't CARE!! Drinking at least 2 glasses of the wine the lovely las brought me. Hoping this is a freakin' UPWARD TREND!!! Please oh please oh please...he actually asked for drawing materials, and this rosary that our tres Catholic friend had given him. That's not our religon or what have you, but hey, I take grace and blessings where I get 'em these days. Plus, she's a wonderful woman and was my maid of honor.....I may bring his dashboard hula girl and this dashboard Jesus from his '55 Chevy, tool... Love, love, love to the world ... | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 445 Registered: 10-2003 |
Woohoo! What a day, dear Cyn! What a day. Drink up, sleep well. | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2613 Registered: 9-2003 |
Cyn - savor the moment - you've earned a good night's sleep! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1831 Registered: 9-2003 |
*burp* OK, now I also have the Tanakh, courtesy of Wendy who, in the course of driving cynicalboy to chemo, had had chat regarding same. Curt grew up in a matriarchy of upstanding Methodist ladies with big bosoms and IDEAS. He has always been more of a religious tradition than I, and therefore open to hearing about same. Me, I'm singing Paul Simon's "Love Me Like a Rock" which is really somebody else's... Please, bring my baby back to me...Thanks, guys, for all your support, aid, succor, prayers, candles, incense, sacrifices. I also got a powerful cadre of Viet Nam vets doing their thing on this. Surely we can either levitate the Pentagon or hopefully Curt with all this energy. (yes, his name is Curt) | ||
| wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1682 Registered: 5-2001 |
A pleasure meeting you and cynical daughter. I agree that positive thoughts can and will work wonders. Here's hoping for a relaxing evening and further good news. | ||
| bets Supporter Username: Bets Post Number: 2388 Registered: 6-2001 |
I'll raise my glass to more good fortune for your family and will hope each day for better news. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1837 Registered: 9-2003 |
Just talked to the oncologist. My husband does NOT have brain cancer and his MRI is normal. Per the nurses, today he is even better than last night. I'll be going in later, and looking forward to it!! | ||
| Me2 Citizen Username: Me2 Post Number: 183 Registered: 6-2003 |
That's great news! And thanks for letting us know his name is "Curt". Praying for "Cynicalboy" has always felt weird to me. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1838 Registered: 9-2003 |
Especially as he's not cynical! Well, at least not in the way I am...he's plenty cynical about politics and similar, just doesn't go on about it. | ||
| Joan Supporter Username: Joancrystal Post Number: 6341 Registered: 5-2001 |
So very glad Curt is on the mend. Negative MRI is terrific news! Things should only get better from here. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 5419 Registered: 5-2001 |
That is so great! Don't worry about posting positives and then having things change. It happens. I've read thru all of our postings & realize that we've all posted lots of ups & downs. Speaking of which.... not exactly a down, but guess who is back in the hospital? Yep. Another infection. My brother called me last night (mom told him not to). One of her friends called me for reassurance. I then felt very badly for awhile. Not just because of this new bump, but because I am in vacation mode & just don't want to deal with it this week. So, I have called my mom & no one else. Normal Bro calls me once a day to update me. I call mom once a day. He is handling the docs & the friends. Poptart Guy is going in to visit on Thursday. Last night, when I talked to mom,she was whining & sounded awful. Which is weird, because earlier in the day she was great. She told me that her friend who took her to the doc & then the hospital told her to stop whining because it's annoying. So, when I talked to her this morning & she sounded perfectly fine & told me she was ed off, I told her that she'd better call her friend L (the one who told her to stop whining). Why? she asked. Because she deserves to know that you are thru with the whining portion of the program and have moved on to anger. At least she laughed. I also told her that she has to beat this not for her children or her grandchildren, but for her friend J, who seems to be more terrified than anyone. This is annoying - the doc apparently told mom that he got a measurement of the tumor. I thought it couldn't be measured? said I. Me too, said she. Turns out that the report he got said "immeasurabel" but that they were able to pinpoint it when he called back and demanded it. My guess is that the size is clinically insignificant compared to where she started and the fact that she is still having chemo. Not clinically insignificant to the family or patient however. s. I told Normal Bro about it & he asked if he should question the doc about it. I told him I wouldn't bother until her next CAT, since it wouldn't change the current treatment plan. But, he can if he wants to. It's his week to worry about it. See y'all later. I have to decide whether to go back to the pool before we leave for Lake Mead. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 5420 Registered: 5-2001 |
Dave and Jamie - this Prude CRAP is getting out of hand!!!!! What's with erasing words? Since when did iss-pay because a bad word? I liked the little red dots. I always thought it was a great compromise between the words and Pollyana, 1950s hypocrapsy. I called the doctors rectal orifices. It is exactly how I feel about the situation. Yet, because there are more than one of them, and I used the plural, it came out "s". I also expressed the fact that my mother feels as if someone has ed on her. I used her exact word. Since I used the past tense, it came out as "ed". This is stupid and pushes me to the edge of exercising my right not to post here. So, my use of a slang word for "urine" is less offensive than others who skirt the rules by using "fcuk", "shiit", etc.? Or do you intend to spend your days blocking all manners of anagrams? I've always supported your right to run your board the way you see fit (literally). But you have got to give people a way to express themselves. IMHO.  | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1839 Registered: 9-2003 |
Still sounds pretty durned good, greenetree. Hurray for you and yours! I'm fresh from the hospital where hisself is even more hisself. Told him about the "cynicalboy" dilemma above. His big challenge now is to resume eating as a regular thing. Appetite ain't there. He did ask me to bring a cheeseburger in tomorrow, and so I shall. If things go like this my guess is he'd come home Friday, with TPN. I am gonna insist, within the insurance, that we get some nursey person in to check his vitals -- and any other help we can get at mid-day. He is home on his own, and I need help. Insurance-provided help! Anywho, I'm gonna go eat a piece of pizza and some wine and fall out a bit. Gather my forces as the workfront is kicking up and there are battles to fight!!! | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 5422 Registered: 5-2001 |
Wow - we had major issues with Mom's TPN. I don't want to scare you, but it's a big deal to manage; you can't just shut it off to take him to the doctor. It has to be tapered over several hours. Is he willing/able to help manage it, reset it, etc. when it faults? Also - don't let him get lazy about eating. Mom did that & practically blew up her liver. She figured she wasn't hungry & didn't have to eat, so she didn't. Make sure that he understands that the goal is to start consuming enough calories to taper off TPN as soon as he can. Have you asked about a peg tube? The only reason mom couldn't have one is because they would have had to work around her tumor & it wasn't advised. Like I said, not trying to make you feel bad or more stressed, I just wish that someone had talked to us more about the pros & cons of TPN before mom had it. Have they given him Megace? Or is he unable to consume enough calories due to GI malfunction? | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1841 Registered: 9-2003 |
Megace -- Was on it before and it worked. Only thing was he had some ankle swelling that might've been related. Not sure if that will be recommended, or what. Yes, I'm worried about TPN mgt and similar. What is a peg tube? Right now, they're putting stuff in via his chemo port up near his collar bone. Right now, calorie consumption is nil. GI is working. Thing that isn't is appetite. Hey, i don't mind at all hearing about issues. Fair warning is a good thing. My biggest desire is that I get some assistance when he's at home, nurse and/or other. We shall see. I'm so grateful that he's doing better that I'm trying to do the one day at a time thing. I have lots of worries, just that they got pushed off while The Really Big Worry was on the table. |
