| Author | Message | ||
     Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1998 Registered: 9-2003  |
Speaking of estrogen levels... The birthday party sleepover, 7 12-13 year old girls plus my daughter, seems to have been a hit. Had to go down there a couple of times to alert to noise and time to settle down, but the last time was at 2:00. Much gossip, noise, mutual hair smoothing with the ceramic heated thing. Lots of food and karaoke. Just ushered one sleepy girl out the door as her mother had to pick her up for church. So, my basement refinish on the cheap (meaning sweat equity, DryLok, self-stick floor tile etc.) seems to worked well. It's amazing what you can do with about 4 2-day week ends of brute labor and a vision! Today, off to buy a turkey, excavate, and be supportive during a somewhat neglected social studies project on Egypt that is, of course, due Tuesday. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6082 Registered: 5-2001  |
This is normal stuff, right? Happy Bday to Cynkid! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 1999 Registered: 9-2003 |
Yes, it is and what a relief. I kept thinking something odd would come up with Curt health and I'd lose it. Now, onward to low-key Thanksgiving, more med tests etc. She'll actually be 12 next Sat but a lot of kids are not around then so we almost always do the kid party bit before. She was borne at like 12:55 a.m. right after T'giving and just into "Black Friday." | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6093 Registered: 5-2001 |
Yeah - this is a hard bus to get off. I bought ticket insurance for our Chicago trip, just in case. Even tho I have no reason to think that anything will go wrong. TS is on the Acela to New Haven. First Class, of course so that she can be waited on in her seat. I broke my knee 8 years ago - my job sent a car for me every day, so no disability. I don't recall TS out planting bulbs (OK - it was February). I wuz robbed. Every conversation with mom now segues into "I want my dog back". I have tried being understanding: I know you miss him. He is happier. Blah, blah. She really just wants to whine. I don't blame her; I would be devastated. Thank god I waited until she made the decision herself. Can you imagine what my life would be like now if I'd just gone ahead and found him a home without her bringing it up? So, last night, mom started with the dog again. Hold on, I sez, handing the phone to TS. Shooting me an evil look, TS says hello. What I heard: Well, then go get him. pause for response Why not? pause for response Well then, shut up about it. I think this will end the whining about the dog portion of our program. I find that I am on this incredible emotional roller coaster. After holding it together for so long, everything hits me like a hurricane. I see a teenager hold the door for an elderly person at the grocert store. A tear comes to my eye. What a simple, kind gesture! My coworker tells me that her kitty was killed by a car this morning; I feel the loss as if it were my own. I am a font of pathos these days. Either that, or I've got wicked PMS. I am, BTW, tempted to start a thread in the Soapbox about a rumble on the playground behind Seth Boyden school between gansta-rapping breeders and maurading gangs of gay men in Gucci. Rumor has it that they will be armed with popcorn and wreaths. Would that be wrong? | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2754 Registered: 9-2003 |
 You have NO idea how much I needed that laugh... God love ya... yea, yea... I know. | ||
| sac Supporter Username: Sac Post Number: 2833 Registered: 5-2001 |
Not only will they have popcorn and wreaths, they will probably be playing tag. | ||
| wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1812 Registered: 5-2001 |
Not if I have anything to say about it. They will be having schmaltz flinging contests - it's the only safe way. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6103 Registered: 5-2001 |
A quick good-bye and "Happy Thanksgiving" to all! This is a time that we truly have to give thanks for. I am probably about to be banned for the Boy Scout Wreath thread. My only regret is that I couldn't come up with some of the adjectives that I really wanted to use - "tip of the tongue" syndrome, I guess. Anyway, see you all in about a week. Hugs & kisses! | ||
| Lucy Supporter Username: Lucy Post Number: 1995 Registered: 5-2005  |
Greenie have a wonderful Thanksgiving relax and enjoy the holiday so much to be thankful for. Hugs and  | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2009 Registered: 9-2003 |
Now HERE's something right up greenie's alley.. So my agenda for the "holiday" weekend was: Thur Make low key thanksgiving for the 3 of us; Fri take Curt for endoscopy; Sat take Curt for CAT scan and celebrate kid birthday; Sun have his sister alone up from DE. She just called to see if she, her husband and kid could come for Thanksgiving. YIKES! We've not seen them in 3 years, and didn't spend tons of quality time together. She and her gigantic, weird husband had pretty much alienated all other family through weirdness and ripping off their father's 401K etc while he lived with them. The dad is somewhere in an old folks home for drunk old guys. They have an adopted child who has become somewhat weird through living with them and home schooling. Alan, Suzi's husband is too odd to simply label a red neck racist. Their child is an African Americn boy given up for adoption by his mother, Suzi's former co-worker. They eat A LOT! They could break the furniture due to size. So, now I gotta go to the PM again and buy MORE STUFF. And cook it. I'll also be picking them up from the Amtrak station in Newark and taking them back, so no wine to get through. I may hire them a cab. HAPPY THANKSGIVING Y'ALL!!! I'm actually laughing at the weirdness of it all...oh, and she doesn't have cancer. Is just obese, with intermittent MS and a little scooter thing. Picture me pushing her up our front stairs. Alan can't help as he has a bad back and is also obese. Now, I'm not so svelte myself, but....!!! So how 'bout that, greenie? A Hallmark holiday all 'round, a variation on one of my favorite movies, Home for the Holidays. | ||
| Virtual It Girl Citizen Username: Shh Post Number: 3483 Registered: 5-2001 |
Oy...if I'd have known I would have let you take my free Pathmark turkey...sounds like you'll need an extra! And I do believe this is the couple you were referring to in my cheap relative thread, no? | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2010 Registered: 9-2003 |
Yepper! Nah, if I supplement my 15 lb turkey with 2 lb boiled shrimp, more rolls, canned yams and a few items it'll work. Truthfully, I'd rather drag them all to a diner in many ways. We were just speaking about how if Suzi'd got her stomach stapled 20 years ago, and decent meds, she might've not felt so desperate as to marry this dork. But, sadly, for many fat girls, anatomy is destiny in terms of marriage. Now, she's so long into it and esteem so shot she'll never climb out of the pit. Suzi's generous, Alan is cheap, controlling and a sort of dry drunk in personality. Christopher, well, we'll see what 9 years of living with them has wrought. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 650 Registered: 10-2003 |
Home schooling in Delaware??? It's going to be a really l o n g day. Have fun pushing her (and her scooter) up the front stairs, Cyn. Remember to bend at the knees. Debby: Thinking of you. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2011 Registered: 9-2003 |
Woke up looking on the bright side. We will have family over for Thanksgiving! I do think I'll see about a cab for them back to the Amtrak station in Newark Thursday. I know the moves, but I'm not a great night driver and not sure I want to Thursday evening. Besides, I could be surprised. I'm not the best with spontaneous occurrences these days, so maybe it was that as much as anything that put me off. I always used to like Suzy just fine, and that part will be good for Curt. It's Alan that I'm concerned about. This man sat making little notes in a notepad throughout our wedding (estimating the cost?). He's very controlling, and a know it all. Think evil Cliff Clavern from Cheers, but looking like nearly bald John Goodman without the humor. The family feud angle is something else, and something that Curt has refused to get involved in. Basically, about 10 years ago their dad got really, really ill from various causes and alcoholism. Went off the wagon when first Curt's mother died of cancer and then 8 years later his brother. Suzi and Alan got power of attorney over his affairs, ahd him move in, and found a way to get a lump sum payment on the dad's retirement plan and some other things, allegedly to fund his end-of-life care. Well, he wasn't dying but they spent it all. And took out a mess of credit cards in his name, and generally took control of his life. After a fashion, the dad moved out (under a cloud, with a woman he'd met at the Elk's club). Now he's somewhere in a home. Serious rift arose in the family over Suzi's allowing this. Between that and Alan's demeanor, no gatherings of all thereafter. But, maybe distance and events will make things ok. It's just a few hours...(yeah, keep telling yerself that!)... | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6121 Registered: 5-2001 |
Cyn - that's wild: I was thinking the same thing about family. Maybe Suzy wants to come early because after everything you've been thru, she wanted to be with you guys? I apologize; the most negative impact that this whole thing has had on me is to give me this unnerving and thoroughly annoying propensity to try and find a bright side. Nevertheless..... It's wild how we choose our battles with our families. I have friends who don't talk to siblings over - yup - parental dispositions. Even one family where there was legal action and someone was convicted of a felony. I don't have anything that dramatic, but there have been times..... I agree with Curt. It takes way too much energy to cut off a sibling or a parent. It needs to be pretty egregious. That said, if they don't behave, you don't need to worry about getting them back on the train - they can ride the scooter. You can let your nephew stay over & put him on a train the next day.  | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2014 Registered: 9-2003 |
Yep, Curt is a conflict avoider. I think Suzi wants to see us, and Alan is looking for a free meal, mostly. He works for Amtrak and gets free tickets, too. He's kinda like that. I am looking forward though...will make a change! Plus, I can always go in the kitchen and wash dishes if the conversation gets annoying. There's no chance Alan will help (very "old school") and I don't think Suzy's up to it. Have a good Thanksgiving, mlle! I'll be wishing I could graft my original in-law family onto my current one, but as they say, you can't always get what you want. | ||
| wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1816 Registered: 5-2001 |
Yes they do say that, Cyn. But hopefully both you and Greenie will get what you need (as hopefully we all will). Have a happy, lovely, HEALTHY, turkey day. And Cyn, just in case, lock up the good silver. | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6129 Registered: 5-2001 |
Grandchildren are sleeping in the den; son & wife in the guest room. Mom up puttering in the kitchen. Whoda thunk it 5 months ago? Happy day, all. Cyn - don't pull anything pushing that scooter..... | ||
| Pippi Supporter Username: Pippi Post Number: 1422 Registered: 8-2003  |
many many wonderful things to give thanks for! happy day! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2017 Registered: 9-2003 |
As will happen, all went better than feared. First of all, I'd forgotten how small they are. Short, that is. Yes, they are large but they are small. The scooter didn't come with, just a cane. When I got to the Newark train station to pick them up at 9:23 a.m. they both just looked so small and old, and Christopher looked os sweet, all of my bad thoughts went out the window. We had a pretty nice time. My stuffing sukked (it really belongs to Stove Top) but the sister an brother in law were happy just to plop on the couch in fron of Miracle on 34th street. Chris is older than I recalled, and he and the kid got along fine. He's a bit of a wiseacre so they were well matched. I'm sleepy this a.m. but mostly wanted to recant my fears. Yes, I did most all the work but it was ok and actually pretty good. They're still odd, but time and distance softened it. So, let that be a lesson to me. Took them back to the train at about 5:15, came home and flopped and watched some Sherlock Holmes (Jeremy Brett) DVDs I'd got last year for Christmas. The thorns were out of everybody's paws. Today I take Curt for the endoscopy and do other household things. So far, all is well...Thanks for all your good thoughts.. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2018 Registered: 9-2003 |
Keep yer fingers crossed, guys 'n dolls. Just came from the endoscopy, and the doc thought all looked good. A bit of scar tissue around Whipple replumb zone. Stuff sent out to lab as must be but doc hopeful Next up: ze Abdominal CAT scan tomorrow... | ||
| wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1817 Registered: 5-2001 |
Fingers and toes crossed, Cynicalgirl. Great news. Regards to all and a very happy Thanksgiving to you and yours including the small relatives. | ||
| Joan Supporter Username: Joancrystal Post Number: 6673 Registered: 5-2001 |
Cynicalgirl: I'm so glad things worked out so well. May they only get better. To paraphrase a previous poster: we all have a lot to be thankful for. May we have even more to be thankful for next year! | ||
| sac Supporter Username: Sac Post Number: 2851 Registered: 5-2001 |
Ditto. Whether you believe in prayer or karma or some other form of (divine?) intervention, it is clear that something of the sort is going on here ... may it continue to bring forth good results! | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2758 Registered: 9-2003 |
Great news Cyn... prayers for continued good news! | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6133 Registered: 5-2001 |
It's like running a race and holding your breath as the sprinter leaps over each hurdle. Will he clear? I know he will..... | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 658 Registered: 10-2003 |
Cyn, I saw Curt today and dare I say last time I saw his face he looked so gray. Today he had color, some golds in his skin, some browns in his hair. What a beautiful, beautiful man! I have been smiling all day. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2024 Registered: 9-2003 |
...now if only his memory could improve! las, we missed your visit yesterday and cynicalkid tried to call you! Curt told me he couldn't remember you, and felt badly later. Chemo side effects. He had the CAT yesterday and Thursday is the day we go to hear (1) all results, and (2) visit the pain doc regarding the Fentanyl. I had quite a fit yesterday, or fight, regarding household temperature. For many reasons, he always feels cold and wants the thermostat at like 76. Me, about 10 degrees colder. Don't want to bore you with details of our set-to, but we really must get a better strategy up with this stuff. I am not kidding when I say that he's asleep more than awake. Too, I think it's the collected anxiety of nearly 1 year, that's 12 calendar months, or 365 days of all of this. It melts me down under presseure of kid birthday, Thanks giving and now upcoming Christmas. Not really so much about the efforts required, but rather the meanings. I wandered the mall yesterday, while my kid and 2 friends shopped. Like any bereft person, all I saw was the happy people, happy dads, happy moms & dads. Normal families. Samuel Beckett was right: Your quantum of wantum never varies. It used to be enough that Curt was alive. Now I want him more like normal, a bit fatter, more awake. More like my husband and my kid's father. Hopefully, such will happen. Invalid Dad is hard on the kid, on me and yeah, on invalid Dad. *** And lest anyone think I'm an ungrateful wretch, please know that I'm not -- towards all of you who have helped in so many ways. I really am a bit of a sprinter as greenetree alludes. And the Smokey Robinson;s "Tears of a Clown" or "Tracks of My Tears" (dating myself). I try to keep pushing that boulder up the hill, but I sure have my moments. Yesterday had a few. But I need you all to know I so appreciate your support. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2025 Registered: 9-2003 |
Just for fun: Here's my brother in law after snacks and before Thanksgiving dinner:  | ||
| Bob K Supporter Username: Bobk Post Number: 9824 Registered: 5-2001 |
It is always nice when a guest makes themself at home.  | ||
| SoOrLady Citizen Username: Soorlady Post Number: 2759 Registered: 9-2003 |
Good to hear that you're "fitting & fighting"... sounds like a normal thing - and normal is so good. Get him a twin electric blanket and a fleece blanket. He sits on one and covers with the other... this system kept my father in law quite toasty. Then you and cyngirl won't have to feel like you're in the tropics. I know what you mean about the holidays. I was doing a bit of decking this weekend with Christmas music playing. John Denver & the Muppets version of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas came on and I just burst into tears. Poor baffeled husband - one minute I'm singing, the next I'm a puddle. Barring some miracle, it looks like this will be our last Christmas with his brother... not that we've given up hope for that miracle.. but... well.. you know all about the buts. | ||
| las Citizen Username: Las Post Number: 659 Registered: 10-2003 |
Ha! Let your cursor rest over the photo. It reads: Butterball!!!! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2026 Registered: 9-2003 |
Yep, Curt named the pix ratherly appropriately. Alan took care of the stuffing. He was braggin that he's now a black belt; he and Chris do karate. In many ways, he's a very good father, odd but very involved in what he's fond of calling his "Heinz 57" son's life. They do karate, a paper route together, many things. Chris has not adopted his parents' eating habits, and is a bit of a pick-er. Things veered a bit in the Jeff Foxworthy direction at times, but it all worked out. SoOrLady, I hope you folks get a miracle. I hope you BiL's wife and household are surviving the holidays. Yeah, it's a lot like what you wrote, ironies. All kinds a stuff floods in. Sometimes, eternal-sunshine-of-the-spotless-mind sounds like a great solution. I think Curt needs a sort of fleece thing like we used to put on babies, with an electrical attachment. You know, with feet? | ||
| Joan Supporter Username: Joancrystal Post Number: 6707 Registered: 5-2001 |
Ah, stretchies as we called them when my son was a toddler or perhaps an adult size bunting would be more appropriate? Seriously, have you tried getting Curt to wear long underwear while he is in the house this time of year. Most types are well insulated, easy to wash, flexible enough to wear in comfort awake or asleep, and they don't have those nasty mobility-impairing electrical cords attached to them. You could always add socks if the bottoms don't cover the soles of the feet. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2027 Registered: 9-2003 |
Yep, in fact we were hunting his old stuff and it turned out to be way too big. Landsend has this thermaskin stuff that I'm ordering him which works well for me... | ||
| wendy Supporter Username: Wendy Post Number: 1828 Registered: 5-2001 |
Think about him trying silk underwear. I seem to be constantly suggesting s words: schmaltz, silk. so be it. | ||
| sac Supporter Username: Sac Post Number: 2855 Registered: 5-2001 |
I have a wonderful fleece zip-up cozy, a bit like a grownup blanket sleeper with sleeves and cuffed legholes for the feet (but no real legs), that allows you to walk around if needed. It is better than a blanket for sitting around the living room, family room, etc. and very toasty. I've seen these in a number of mail order catalogs. Highly recommended! | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2030 Registered: 9-2003 |
Tiny update: the gastroenterologist called yesterday and said the results of the endoscopy looked fine from the local lab pov. This is good! | ||
| greenetree Supporter Username: Greenetree Post Number: 6152 Registered: 5-2001 |
yayayayayay! Gimme a C! Gimme an O! Gimme an L! Gimme another O! Gimme and N! Whaddya got! Nothing! Ya don't got cancer! Mom called yesterday, too. She's jonesing for a dog. My brothers have all told her that they aren't discussing it with her, that she needs to talk to me about it. She's still afraid to drive an hour to her friend's lake house and gets tired. I told her that when she can drive to the lake house and goes back to work and gets a schedule under control, we can talk about it. I also told her that it has to be a breed that once of us would be willing to take. She goes for her brain mapping on 12/15. She has to wear a mask during PCI. I told her to ask if she can bring her own mask; I'll get her a Spongebob. | ||
| Cynicalgirl Citizen Username: Cynicalgirl Post Number: 2040 Registered: 9-2003 |
Fresh from the oncologist: No sign of cancer at this time! Resume some lesser level of chemo in the new year to insure (as it will recur at some point). Now, to fatten him up and get him off Fentanyl!!! Merry Christmas to me! |
